Culture (Rashifa Ramadhai al-wahab)

A. Amount of gesture

1.       

Beckon with index finger. This means “Come here” in the U.S. To motion with the index finger to call someone is insulting, or even obscene, in many cultures. Expect a reaction when you beckon to a student from the Middle or Far East; Portugal, Spain, Latin America, Japan, Indonesia and Hong Kong. It is more acceptable to beckon with the palm down, with fingers or whole hand waving.

2.       

  Point at something in the room using index finger. It is impolite to point with the index finger in the Middle and Far East. Use an open hand or your thumb (in Indonesia)

3.        Make a "V" sign. This means "Victory" in most of Europe when you make this sign with your palm facing away from you. If you face your palm in, the same gesture means "Shove it."

4.       

  Smile. This gesture is universally understood. However, it various cultures there are different reasons for smiling. The Japanese may smile when they are confused or angry. In other parts of Asia, people may smile when they are embarrassed. People in other cultures may not smile at everyone to indicate a friendly greeting as we do in the United States. A smile may be reserved for friends. It is important not to judge students or their parents because they do not smile, or smile at what we would consider "inappropriate" times.

5.          Sit with soles shoes showing. In many cultures this sends a rude message. In Thailand, Japan and France as well as countries of the Middle and Near East showing the soles of the feet demonstrates disrespect. You are exposing the lowest and dirtiest part of your body so this is insulting.

6.       

Form a circle with fingers to indicate “O.K.” Although this means “O.K.” in the U.S. and in many countries around the world, there are some notable exceptions:

·         In Brazil and Germany, this gesture is obscene.

·         In Japan, this means “money.”

·         In France, it has the additional meaning of “zero” or “worthless.”

7.        Pat a student on the head. This is very upsetting to students from Asia. The head is the repository of the soul in the Buddhist religion. Children from cultures which are influenced by Buddhism will feel uncomfortable if their head is touched.

8.       

 Pass an item to someone with one hand. - In Japan this is very rude. Even a very small item such as a pencil must be passed with two hands. In many Middle and Far Eastern countries it is rude to pass something with your left hand which is considered “unclean.”

9.       

   Wave hand with the palm facing outward to greet someone. In Europe, waving the hand back and forth can mean “No.” To wave “good-bye,” raise the palm outward and wag the fingers in unison, This is also a serious insult in Nigeria if the hand is too close to another person’s face.

10.   

Nod head up and down to say “Yes.” In Bulgaria and Greece, this gesture means “No.”

Gesture

B. Distance between people Public Distance Zone    it's the most outer 'bubble' and is usually larger than 3.6 meters (approx. 12 feet). This zone is reserved for public speaking, or generally, when talking to a large group. It's just feels much comfortable to address a large group from a distance – it's as if you consider the whole group as one individual with a great amount of personal space. This is comfortable for the audience too – they all get to see you (and hopefully hear you well enough too).

This zone is also great for general observation of other people without really interacting with them. A neutral zone so to say. Imagine, for example, that you found someone attractive and you look at them from this far distance – it's probably OK and perhaps even flattering for them. Getting closer and stare, though, can send chills down their spine.

Social Distance Zone

This space is between 1.5 – 3 meters (5 – 10 feet). It's the most neutral and comfortable zone to start a conversation between people who don't know each other well. It's the distance you keep from strangers that you may have some interaction with them like: shopkeepers, clerks in the bank and other sales or service providers.

Image Source

Sometimes you will find that this distance is actually shorter, especially in a sitting scenario. The explanation I find most fitting to this behavior is that in those cases there is usually some kind of an artificial barrier between you and the stranger – a desk or some board/book/paper you or they hold. This barrier helps to relax and maintain the comfort zone and in the meanwhile allows you to be in closer proximity to discuss and examine details.

Personal Distance Zone

  Ranges from 60cm to 1.5 meters (2-5 feet).

This space is reserved for friends and family – people you know and trust. It's an easy and relaxed space for talking, shaking hands, gesturing and making faces.

Now, there's also some division inside this personal space, it depends on personal preferences and affection. The guideline here is this: the more you like someone – the closer you'll stand to him.

I've talked about leaning forward in positive body language posture article, and the main idea is that leaning forward towards someone usually show's interest, affection and it builds rapport. 

If possible, you should avoid getting too close to prevent invading personal space. But getting closer, in an acceptable level, shows that you like the other person. So you start the magical circle of rapport – they see that you like them, they like that you like them and in turn they will like you back. (so many likes..!)

Intimate Distance Zone

   Ranges from direct contact to 60 cm (2 feet).

Obviously it's the space reserved only for the most trusted and loved in our social circles: partners and siblings. It doesn't mean that we're offended by a friend's hug or anything, only it's going to be brief and less intimate.

This space (especially the 15 cm (1/2 foot) zone bubble) is like a private bubble of breathing space, almost as an extension of our body. When someone is getting that close, our body and mind automatically reacts – it's being put on flight or fight mode. If it's someone acceptable in our most inner circle – we relax and enjoy the intimacy, but if the presence is unwelcome, we will shut down and try to retain somehow our comfort zone.

Some people use "power plays" to invade that space and to take advantage of this state of confusion and vulnerability. For example, one of the popular interrogation techniques is to intimidate the suspect by getting very close to invade his intimate zone. Then, while he's helpless, try to exploit his vulnerability and discomfort to extract information.

Another optional interpretation for getting this close is: sexual advancement (or a faked sexual interest – to seduce and manipulate) –it's an indication that the other party wants more than a mere friendship – they want intimacy.

Intimate Crowd

What about crowded conditions? Like when standing in a full elevator or bus? A crowded concert or a long line in the DMV office?

While we certainly don't feel very comfortable in these situations, we're not on our edge either, so what really happen?

Obviously we don't welcome these strangers to our intimate zone by will, but on the other hand we know that we have no choice in that matter and neither do them. So our brain found an elegant solution – we avoid treating them as other individuals in an act called dehumanization. Since we subconsciously choose to 'ignore' them as human beings, to feel more secure about ourselves, we automatically avoid any human contact with them:

•   We avoid eye contact –staring at the ceiling or floor.
•   We wear blank face expressions.
•   We make the minimal movements and gestures possible to avoid contact

That's why crowded public spaces often viewed as cold and distant, there is a big contrast between having so much people in one place and so little human contact. But that's understandable, since we don't have much choice in that matter – we just don't feel secure enough surrounded by strangers standing so close.

If you're bold or adventurous enough you can try making eye contact and smile (or express some other human quality) while 'stuck' in such crowded situation. I bet you'll find it extremely awkward and the results varied: some will meet you with a bewildered, frightened face "what do you want, psycho?" kind of thing, others may send you a smile back… (:

Bottom Line

In this post I introduced you with one of the main concepts of Proxemics - the division of personal distance into zones. Don't confuse it with personal territory – think about it as a bubble that encircle you all the time and affects your reactions to others.

Your territory on the other hand is the places and things you consider to be yours, even when you're not there near them: your country, your city, your house, your room, your chair, your phone etc.

C. Type of facial expressions

1. Absent: preoccupied

2. Agonized: as if in pain or tormented

3. Alluring: attractive, in the sense of arousing desire

4. Appealing: attractive, in the sense of encouraging goodwill and/or interest

5. Beatific: see blissful

6. Bilious: ill-natured

7. Black: angry or sad, or see hostile

8. Bleak: see grim and hopeless

9. Blinking: surprise, or lack of concern

10. Blissful: showing a state of happiness or divine contentment

11. Blithe: carefree, lighthearted, or heedlessly indifferent

12. Brooding: see anxious and gloomy

13. Bug eyed: frightened or surprised

14. Chagrined: humiliated or disappointed

15. Cheeky: cocky, insolent

16. Cheerless: sad

17. Choleric: hot-tempered, irate

18. Coy: flirtily playful, or evasive

19. Crestfallen: see despondent

20. Darkly: with depressed or malevolent feelings

21. Deadpan: expressionless, to conceal emotion or heighten humor

22. Dejected: see despondent

23. Derisive: see sardonic

24. Despondent: depressed or discouraged

25. Doleful: sad or afflicted

26. Dour: stern or obstinate; see also despondent

27. Downcast: see despondent

28. Dreamy: distracted by daydreaming or fantasizing

29. Ecstatic: delighted or entranced

30. Etched: see fixed

31. Faint: cowardly, weak, or barely perceptible

32. Fixed: concentrated or immobile

33. Furtive: stealthy

34. Gazing: staring intently

35. Glancing: staring briefly as if curious but evasive

36. Glaring: see hostile

37. Glazed: expressionless due to fatigue or confusion

38. Gloomy: see despondent and sullen

39. Glowering: annoyed or angry

40. Glowing: see radiant

41. Grim: see despondent; also, fatalistic or pessimistic

42. Grave: serious, expressing emotion due to loss or sadness

43. Haunted: frightened, worried, or guilty

44. Hopeless: depressed by a lack of encouragement or optimism

45. Hostile: aggressively angry, intimidating, or resistant

46. Hunted: tense as if worried about pursuit

47. Impassive: see deadpan

48. Inscrutable: mysterious, unreadable

49. Jeering: insulting or mocking

50. Languid: lazy or weak

51. Leering: see meaningful; also, sexually suggestive

52. Meaningful: to convey an implicit connotation or shared secret

53. Mild: easygoing

54. Mischievous: annoyingly or maliciously playful

55. Moody: see sullen

56. Pained: affected with discomfort or pain

57. Pallid: see wan

58. Peering: with curiosity or suspicion

59. Peeved: annoyed

60. Petulant: see cheeky and peeved

61. Pitying: sympathetic

62. Pleading: seeking apology or assistance

63. Pouting: see sullen

64. Quizzical: questioning or confused

65. Radiant: bright, happy

66. Roguish: see mischievous

67. Sanguine: bloodthirsty, confident

68. Sardonic: mocking

69. Scornful: contemptuous or mocking

70. Scowling: displeased or threatening

71. Searching: curious or suspicious

72. Set: see fixed

73. Shamefaced: ashamed or bashful

74. Slack-jawed: dumbfounded or surprised

75. Sly: cunning; see also furtive and mischievous

76. Snarling: surly

77. Sneering: see scornful

78. Somber: see grave

79. Sour: unpleasant

80. Stolid: inexpressive

81. Straight-faced: see deadpan

82. Sulky: see sullen

83. Sullen: resentful

84. Taunting: see jeering

85. Taut: high-strung

86. Tense: see taut

87. Tight: see pained and taut

88. Unblinking: see fixed

89. Vacant: blank or stupid looking

90. Veiled: see inscrutable

91. Wan: pale, sickly; see also faint

92. Wary: cautious or cunning

93. Wide eyed: frightened or surprised

94. Wild eyed: excited, frightened, or stressful

95. Wistful: yearning or sadly thoughtful

96. Withering: devastating; see also wrathful

97. Woeful: full of grief or lamentation

98. Wolfish: see leering and mischievous

99. Wrathful: indignant or vengeful

100. Wry: twisted or crooked to express cleverness or a dark or ironic feeling

D. Kind of eye contact

Western Cultures  
The UK, USA, Australia and Western Europe all have fairly similar social expectations of when and where eye contact is appropriate… which is most of the time!
Eye contact is expected in Western culture, it is a basic essential to a social interaction which shows a person’s interest and engagement with your conversation.
In Western cultures eyes are considered to show the central point of a person’s focus. So if somebody doesn’t give any eye contact during a conversation, it may be considered insulting. Many people would take this to mean that they weren’t interested, and take their wandering eyes as a sign of their distraction.
In other, more formal, circumstances in Western cultures a lack of eye contact can be seen in another way. For example, in an interview situation, strong eye contact by the interviewee is seen as a sign of self-belief, whereas a lack of eye contact is seen as a lack of confidence.


Middle Eastern Cultures 
While the many cultures of the Middle Eastern countries can hardly be grouped together, they do have a few common trends – one of which is their use of eye contact.
Eye contact is less common, and considered less appropriate than in Western cultures. There are strict gender rules, whereby women should not make too much eye contact with men as it could be misconstrued as a romantic interest.
Intense eye contact is often a method used to show sincerity. Long, strong eye contact can mean ‘believe me, I’m telling you the truth’.
Asian Cultures 
Asian cultures place great importance on respect. Hierarchies are much more visible in their society than in Western cultures, and their social behaviors mirror this.
In countries such as China and Japan, eye contact is not considered an essential to social interaction, instead it is often considered inappropriate. In such an authoritarian culture, it is believed that subordinates shouldn’t make steady eye contact with their superiors.
For example, students are discouraged from making eye contact with their professors, as it can be interpreted as a sign of disrespect. Similarly a daughter will point her eyes downwards when her father is speaking to her, as a sign of politeness and respect.

African and Latin American Cultures 
Many African and Latin American cultures, while unique in many ways, remain strong hierarchical societies. In many circumstances intense eye contact is seen as aggressive, confrontational and extremely disrespectful.
Eye contact is so subtly ingrained into every culture that it is something which is rarely even considered before travelling abroad.
Westerner’s use of eye contact could be deemed inappropriate, and even disrespectful, in many other cultures – so make sure you learn the use of eye contact and body language before you jet off!
Steph loves to travel. She has traveled to many different countries and experienced life in many different cultures – so you can trust her to understand the importance of eye contact and body language. She writes for Lenstore, an online retailer of contact lenses.

Amount of touching

1)      Touch for monoy

A well-timed touch can encourage other people to return a lost item. In one experiment, users of a phone booth who were touched were more likely to return a lost dime to an experimenter (Kleinke, 1977). The action was no more than a light touch on the arm.

People will do more than that though; people will give a bigger tip to a waitress who has touched them (Crusco & Wetzel, 1984). (Stop giggling at the back there!)

2)      Touch for help

People are also more likely to provide help when touched. In one study, strangers who were touched lightly on the arm were more likely to help an experimenter pick up things they had dropped (Gueguen, 2003). The percentage of people who helped went up from 63% to 90%.

3)      Touch for compliance

The power of a light touch on the upper arm often extends more broadly to compliance.

In a study by Willis and Hamm (1980), participants were asked to sign a petition. While 55% of those not touched agreed to sign it, this went up to 81% of those participants touched once on the upper arm. A second study asked people to fill in a questionnaire. The same touch increased compliance from 40% to 70%.

4)      Touch twice for more compliance

  And you can increase compliance with a second light touch on the arm.

Vaidis and Halimi-Falkowicz (2008) tried this out when asking people in the street to complete a questionnaire. Those touched twice were more likely to complete the questionnaire than those touched once. The effects were strongest when men were touched by a female surveyor.

5)      Or, touch for a fight!

However, the acceptability of touch, especially between men, depends a lot on culture.

When Dolinski (2010) carried out a compliance experiment in Poland, he got quite different results for men and women. In Poland men asked to do the experimenter a favour reacted badly to a light touch on the arm. This seemed to be related to higher levels of homophobia. Women, however, still reacted positively to touch.

6)      Touch to sell your car

Unlike Poland, France has a contact culture and touching is acceptable between two men. So French researchers Erceau and Gueguen (2007) approached random men at a second-hand car market. Half were touched lightly on the arm for 1 second, the other half weren’t.Afterwards those who had been touched rated the seller as more sincere, friendly, honest, agreeable and kind. Not bad for a 1-second touch. We can safely assume the results would have been quite different in Poland!

7)      Touch for a date

You won’t be surprised to hear that men show more interest in a woman who has lightly touched them. But here’s the research anyway: Gueguen (2010) found men easily misinterpreted a light nonsexual touch on the arm as a show of sexual interest.Perhaps more surprisingly women also responded well to a light touch on the arm when being asked for their phone number by a man in the street (Gueguen, 2007). This may be because women associated a light 1 or 2-second touch with greater dominance. (Bear in mind, though, that this research was in France again!)

8)      Touch for power

Touch communicates something vital about power relationships. Henley (1973) observed people in a major city as they went about their daily business. The people who tended to touch others (versus those being touched) were usually higher status. Generally we regard people who touch others as having more power in society (Summerhayes & Suchner, 1978).

9)      Touch to communicate

  Touch comes in many different forms and can communicate a variety of different emotions. Just how much can be communicated through touch alone is demonstrated by one remarkable study by Hertenstein et al. (2006).

Using only a touch on the forearm, participants in this study tried to communicate 12 separate emotions to another person. The receiver, despite not being able to see the toucher, or the touch itself, were pretty accurate for anger, fear, disgust, love, gratitude and sympathy. Accuracy ranged from 48% to 83%.

To put it in context, that is as good as we can do when we can see someone’s face.

10)  Massage for maths

  So, if you can do all that with a touch, imagine what you could do with a massage!

Well, one study has found that it can boost your maths skills (Field, 1996). Compared with a control group, participants who received massages twice a week for 5 weeks were not only more relaxed but also did better on a maths test. Once again, witness the incredible power of touch.